This week following Laetare Sunday is a little hard. The dry, drowsy state of my soul (as the Little Flower so succinctly described it) is the worst kind of struggle. I know in my head it's the Lord's way of pushing me to maturity. Without His prodding, without His rewards, can I--no, WILL I--still turn to Him in prayer, still give myself over? Is my love the kind of love rewarded with a treat or affection as a pet, or is it REAL love, the total love that would take me to the Cross in imitation of Christ?
He wants everything from us--even the dryness and drowsiness. "I wish to give all to Jesus, since He makes me understand that He alone is perfect happiness. All!--all shall be for Him! And even when I have nothing, as is the case tonight, I will give Him this nothing..." from Story of a Soul by St. Therese of Lisieux.